**** = A cinematic gem. A film library requirement.

***1/2 = A great flick that I want to buy so I can watch it over and over.

*** = A good film that I have no problem recommending to anyone.

**1/2 = A pretty good film that I would recommend to only specific people for certain reasons. It’s just lacking something to be a good film overall.

** = Pretty standard flick.

*1/2 = A bad flick that has at least something redeeming about it.

* = So bad that it’s painful to watch the whole thing — nothing at all redeeming about it.

ZERO = Offensively bad for wasting your time, egotistical self-indulgence and/or bad taste.

BOMB = So bad that it’s good. Watch it for the thrill of witnessing unintentional laughs. These films defy regular critique, deserving a category all of their own.